I Heart Fridays

Reviews: Sometimes in my youth, I would give into my cravings for ice cream or fried chicken or pelting the handicapped with calamari or drinking alcohol (kidding about that last one!), but honestly? I never felt very good about it afterwards - I mean, trust me, all of those things are fun in moderation, but overdo it and the next morning is pretty rough. Now, since my surgery, I've had to tone down my fun. Instead, I double-dipped at the movies last night: one in a theater and one at home (thank you, Netflix!!!!).

The first was 'Little Miss Sunshine,' which I didn't think was very fun - the parents (Greg Kinnear, who I haven't liked since he stole screen time from Matt Damon in 'Stuck on You', when they played conjoined twins + Toni Collette, who's British and has no business portraying anyone American; that'd be like Margaret Thatcher being our secretary of state) had zero chemistry. The plot of the movie is that everyone's driving with the daughter in the family to a beauty pageant. Problem is, this girl had no chance to win this pageant. I know what they were trying to say: beauty's what's on the inside, blah blah, but I felt like they overdid it. I mean, beauty in pageants is on the outside. And your talent. Plus, they apparently couldn't come up with lines for the brother, because he didn't speak for most of the movie. First line he says? He screams the f-word. Nice family movie. I hated it.

Back home, I watched 'Naked States,' which wasn't much better. It's basically a concert film for this photographer, Spencer Tunick. He likes to gather lots of people together in downtowns, and then have them take off their clothes and pose all together. But he doesn't even want them to look at the camera. He wants them to all lie down and face away from him while he screams at them if even one of them raises a leg or something. It was all a little uncomfortable to watch. I don't ever take off my own clothes anymore, and I sure don't want to see anyone else naked, not to mention that I don't like to see ugly people with their clothes on, much less in the nude. I mean, this guy Tunick doesn't seem to have much eye for what's beautiful. Maybe he should go to a beauty pageant and find out what pretty people really look like. Like this (the one in the back with the crown thingy):



Myself, I'll have to write a stern letter to the FCC. More tomorrow, gentle readers!

There is no Soviet domination of Eastern Europe,
Gerry