Neither Here Nor There

Gerry's Corner: Since I've probably only got ten or twenty good years left, and then another several as I slowly slip into senility, I've been thinking a little about my demise. In my pampered life as president, I know I've been spared any real brushes with death, other than those two assassination attempts, but sometimes old age just makes your mind drift in that direction. Is there anything in particular I'd like to have done or told people? Well, most of the stuff I've wanted to say behind the back of people is up here on the blog; eventually, I assume most of those people will happen upon it since I'll put its web address in my will. I assume I won't care much by then what their reactions are.

I do know that I'd like my memorial service to be open casket, just so everyone can get one last good look at my extremely handsome face. Except that I want to throw my fans for a bit of a loop just before I'm laid to rest. You see, I wrote a book called Humor and the Presidency, and I like to think of myself as a fairly witty guy. This fact, coupled with the fact that I wasn't blessed with the ability to grow very good facial hair, means that I'd like to wear a fake moustache to the funeral. You know, nice suit, power tie, funny moustache. At least it would make Not-Betty smile, just like my memorial statue to our faithful dog Liberty did.

Here are a few moustaches I like, in case certain people want to start planning:







There is no Soviet domination of Eastern Europe,
Gerry